change in heart
by smile-like-nothings-wrong
Summary: set in breaking dawn and befor bellas baby. Bella comes home after hunting and see some thing that changes her life and love she has a change in heart and runaways and becomes a singer.
1. past and present

dont own anyting or anyone.

start over!

belly p.o.v.

*flash back*

I was walking back into the house after hunting with the family exept Edward and Alice they had went the day befor. For some reason i had a bad feeling but i let it go. As i walk up the stairs i heard some weird noises but let that go as well. When i got to my room i heard the noises as loud as ever. I opended the door and saw the last thing i ever thought would happen. Edward on top of Alice nude and looking more in love then him and i have ever been. I gasped and they had heard because their heads wipped around then Edward said "Bella this not what it looks li-" but i didnt hear the last part because i throw my marrage ring and engament ring at them and ran only hearing my name as i ran. When I got to the door the rest of the Cullen were there looking confessed all i did was point and Edward came down the stairs in his boxers and Alice in a robe. "what the hell is going on" Jasper asked and i answerd "What going on is i no longe have a husband and you wife is a slut!!" and with that i ran away, from love and my family.

*end of flash back*

Know I was waiting in my dressing room to go on mtv live for a interview on life. I am now a singer. No longer is my name Isabella Swan or Isabella Cullen its Isabella Rosalie MaCarty then my manager Jacob Black my bestfriend and werewolf walk in and said Bells your on in 5. Then walk out i followed then 4min i walked on stage and heard 5,4,3,2,1 and the on the air sigh turn from red to green.  
Then Adrian Baillon greated me and i said hellow as i sat down.

Ally (Alice) p.o.v.

I just had a vision it was bella on tv mtv at 9:00 and i t was 9 now so I ran over to Emmett and stoll the remote and sat on Ewards lap because Jasper devorsed me but we where friends. Then Emmett said "hey what was that for" Then i said "shut up and watch" as i change the chanell to 63 MTV. Just then Bella walked on stage and sat down a cross from Adrian Baillon. Everyone gasped exeped me. Then Edward said "what the hell" then i shhed him and told him to watch as well. Then the questions begain that all of us wanted to know. "So Bella why did you become a singer and what caused it?" Adrian ask and Bella answered "Well my husband cheated on me so i ran i was young and foolish to think anyone as perfect as him could love me and i became a singer to let my feelings out" Wow "So is Isabella Rosalie MaCrty Whitlock your real name? "wow she chaged her name for them. "no it is not but Isabella is my real first name" She answerd " Why'ed you chose to change?" "well Rosalie was my ex-husband adopted sister we didnt get along but i still cared for her she was one of those girls that just by looking at her you self-eseem(sp) woul drop" Wow "and MaCrty was the last name of Edwards adopted brother he was like my big brother that i nevere had he was always there he was my teady bear and i miss him dearly" that mad Emmett smile "and Whitlock is the last name of both Edwards other adopted brother and he was married to the woman who stoll my boyfrieand" ouch "so Edward i asume is your ex-husband name" Adrain asked "yes he is" Bella answed "so what songs did this event inspire?" Adrian asked "well a lot theres 'number one' (skye sweetnam) knock you down (keri hilson) I hate this part (pcd) what hurts the most (cascade) gone forever ( 3 days grace) and many more" wow we're a huge topic in her life "can you sing a few for us" Adrian ask "why of coures" then she got up and walked over to the mic and the music started.

"i saw my boyfriend hanging with this girl that i hate

He didnt have to tell me why last night he was late

i cant believe what you tell me

your lies have come undone

now im living on the run looking out for number one

I took a ride to the city

had to get out of this place

i just cant stand the pity

when the tears fall down my face

i used to think i was over

but its only just begun

Now im living on the run looking out for number one

one day youll see me but only when you dreaming

one day youll say i was the one

I hitched a ride on a greyhound.

stashed away on a train

Bought a ticket for the subway

playin guitar in the rain

I want to follow the river to an island in the sun

now im living on the run looking out for number one

one day youll see but only when your dreaming

one day youll say i was the one

late at night trying to fight

i just might think about him

right now im feeling fine

yeah!

oneday youll see mee but only when your dreaming

oneday youll say i was the one

i know that one day youll see me

ill haunt you when your dreaming

oneday youll say i was the one

im number one.

wow she hates me. "thank you" and then she was gone again.

review review. ah toodles!!! 


	2. music for 'them'

Ok pupl here's the next chap.

dont own shiz ok.

Belly p.o.v.

After walking off the stage Jack was at my side. He must have seen that I didnt want to talk. I was to deep in thought to notice if he was talking. I had a bad feeling and ever sense Edward i trust my feelings. You could say it was my 'power' but i call it instinced.

Ally p.o.v.

After Bella walked off the stage everyone was quiet. Then I had a nother vison we all were at a consert it looked like I was Bella on stage, but when I looked closer it was. When I came back from my little world I could tell that Edward hadnt seen my vision so I ran to my room and grabbed my lap top and ran back down the stairs. When I was there I went to ticket master. When I had bought 7 tickets. Then I went on youtube and looked for bella music. The song came on and I skipped to the middle.  
It was called Read my mind.(killers)

The good old days,the honest man

The restless hearr, the promised land

A subtle kiss that no one sees

A broken wrist and a big trapeze

Oh well I dont mind, if you dont mind

cause I dont shine if you dont shine

Befor you go, can you read my mind?

Its funny how you just break down

waiting on some sign

I pull up to the front of your driveway

With magic soaking my spine

Can you read my mind?

Can you read my mind?

The teenage Queen,(Rose) the loaded gun (Emmett)

The drop dead dream, the chosen one (Edward)

A southern drawl, (Jasper) the world unseen

A city wall and a trampoline (Alice)

Wow shes talking about us oh I wonder if I can fix Bella and jaspr together. Plans that shall work started up in my brain and i knew Edward heard cuz his head snaped to me and he smiled he was in the plan. Yes Muwaha never unestemate the pixie.

Im stopping there because im not suposed to be on the computer so all should love me for braking the rules. Ah toodles and remember to love Emmett!!!!!!!! 


	3. jazzy pov

Here ya go.

dont own shiz.

Jazz p.o.v.

After Alice practicly sreamed about her vison i went you stairs to go on the computer to listen to bella with out my family. You see the reson I sttayed away from Bella wasnt because of her blood i was my feelings tords. And I didnt want to rowin edwards and her relasion ship.

When I got to the computer I went on youtube (wonders of youtube) When I tyeped in Bella a song called fools like me showed up. (song by Vanessa Carlton)

Beware the danger it lurks for those who get swept away,

The dreamers get punished

most by the truth they say,

Its all in the little

way one reveals,

their loves gone away,

loves gone away

And when my hand was in you

hand my heart beats was pure now,

I see a different man

Re-written memories,

The dogs run down the beach and

all im left with,is sand in my shoes

sand in my shoes.

fools like me. Oh we love blindly,

And the cracks dont count its gotta break

in front of me

And now i recall a time at the cafe,

A thunderstorm outside,

words you could never say,

they hold the loudest

tones, you say youll write but its

just ink on a page, ink on a page

fools like me

Oh we love blindly,

and the cracks dont count its gotta break in front of me,

tie toc the time

a distant look grows in your eyes

but fools never asl afraid what lurks in your

mind,

I always knew,

Somehow always knew

I always knew the truth,

*piano*

Fools like me ,

Oh we never see,

cause the cracks dont count

its gotta break in front or

ME!

and its breakin, its breakin,

its gotta break for me!! to see

at least i can say

i was not afraid,

i loved you all the way,

I'd pick a fool any day......

Wow. I bet she still love him.

I scrolled down a little until some thing caught my eye

a song called ordanary day and next to it said for jasper hale.

i clicked it and bella started to sing

just day, just an ordainary day

just trying to get by

just a boy

just an ordinary boy

nut he was looking to the sky

but i couldnt finish the song because i noticed Every one in my room looking at the computer screen and thats when i wondered how long they had been there . and had got an aswer from Edward

"from your confesson to be in complet lust with my ex-wife" he said with a smirk

then Emmett burst out laughing but Edward stopped him by saying.

"that first song was about me and her and the other one you hm she must like you to"

ok im stopping there cus im still groundes and breaking rules so. Ah toodles and love Emmett!!!!!!!!!!!!???? 


	4. consert

Belly p.o.v.

The feeling I had since my interview on m.t.v. has grown stronger. But my feeling aside

I have a show to put on. I was in my dressing room changing into a vampires suck shirt (they don't but the shirt is cool and the outfit will be on my profile soon) and a pair of

Chucks and as Jake would say rainbow accessories. And walked on the stage and saw 7 faces I hoped I'd never see.

Emmy p.o.v. (cuz he's cool)

We had gotten 7 seats in the front row and I was literally jumping out of my seat I coudnt wait to see my lil'sis . About 10 min. later Bella walked on stage in a 'vampires suck' shirt and then she saw us. She froze but then quickly recovered. Then she said into the microphone. The first song im going to sing is 'rise'(flobots)"

'**so much pain we**

**Don't know how to be, but angry**

**Feel infected like we've got gangrene**

**Please don't let anybody try to change me **

**Me,**

**Just me.**

**In the middle of a sea full of faces,**

**Full of faces.**

**Some laugh some salivate**

**What in your alleyway **

**Recycling bins or bullet cases**

**Its not equal. Its not fair**

**Were different people **

**Nut were not scared **

**We ain't never scared.**

"**his next song is called scary love" Bella said**

**What is love, my love?**

**Tell me, do you know**

**To me its dirt and blood and seed **

**That's how my garden grows **

**What id this pain inside my veins/**

**It turned to frost**

**Is there an operation please?**

**And how much does it cost?**

**This love is a scary love**

**If I had one day left to live**

**Id lock the doors and windows and keep you in**

**If I had one day left to live **

**I'd wrap myself around you and breathe you in**

**Scary love,**

**It's a scary love**

**What is love my love?**

**Tell me why it burns?**

**Like rage and fire inside of me it causes no concern**

**Im quite used to it **

**The ashes on my hand **

**At least I've felt the pain of love**

**What one understands.**

**The pain in here voice as she sang is not how I want my lil'sis to sing. **

**The Bella said "The next song im going to sing is called 'lucked out' (written by me)**

**Hey boy **

**Did you have to play me like a toy**

**Well boy you lucked out you never got to see**

**What im all about'**

**Come on **

**And scream out**

' **you lucked out'**

**You left me then came back **

**Then I left you do you see the pattern**

**Are you happy? **

**You didn't have to act all sappy**

**You didn't have to tell me you loved me**

**No one forced**

**Its you fault **

**No one said 'love her' **

**NO**

**well you lucked out**

**you had to cheat **

**that just says that you cant be trusted**

**it says you're a liar**

**well boy **

**you lucked out"**

**There you go people yes im grounded still but he yyou gotta love me. Ah toodles**

**And gotta love Emmett **


	5. author not plz read

_Ok I'm so sorry I haven't updated I was just let back on the computer but I have to think of what happens next. I know its only been like three days but I wanted to do one every other day and I haven't so sorry. But in the mean time check out my other fanfics and vote on Alice's dress which is on my profil . And my friend magpie89 fanfic I sort of help on some of them. Ah toddles and remember to love EMMETT!!!!!!!!_


	6. consert part 2

Yo YO my peps lol sorry I haven't updated and I mit not for awhile at a time 'cuz I have a state report im working on so I'll try to get at lest 2 every other week sorry.

Don't own shiz.

Jazzy's p.o.v. (cuz he's cool)

After Bella came on stage all the songs she sang caused both Alice and Edward guilt and sorrow (good lol) and I bet there's more coming.

"My next song is called hush, hush and It goes out to Edward Cullen " Bella said wow mean much ( tough nubs bubs and song by pcd)

'**I never need you to be strong**

**I never needed you for pointing' out my wrongs**

**I never needed pain, I never needed strain**

**My love for you was strong enough**

**You should've known**

**I never need you for judgment**

**I never needed you to **

**Question what I spent**

**I never Asked for help **

**I take care of myself**

**I don't know why you think you got a hold on me**

**And it's a little late for conversations**

**There isn't anything for you to say**

**And my eyes hurt**

**Hands shiver**

**So look at me and listen to me because**

**I don't want to stay another minute **

**I don't want you to say a single word**

**HUSH , hush**

"_ok one last song" Bella said _

**Loves a pain it drives me insane**

**Loves a bitch but you gotta live with it **

**Tough love, tough love**

**No body wants it nobody needs it but we get it**

**We deal with it**

**But not like me **

**Has your love turn to a guy you tried to resist**

**Did your father and your friends say no? **

**But your heart say go **

**Did you r mama say he's no good **

**And he not going to stay**

**But you thought he would **

**Did he run away come back and you'd take him back**

**Did your heart twist and turn and you lips began to burn**

**When you kiss**

**Well that was a sign to pack your shit and run **

**It's tough love **

**But you stayed got married then caught him in bed**

**With your best friend **

**Well its tough love we all got to go with it and it's a bitch**

**Tough love '**

"Thank you all for coming and good night" Bella said then walked of stage

Ok there you go next chap. Got lots of screaming . warning Edward bashing in next chap.

Remember love Emmett . Ah toddles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	7. i can be mad as I want

HERE you go .

I don't own anything

After the concert I changed and went home after telling Jake that I had to leave. Trying to stay away form them. But when I got home they were there but I walked past them and to the door and walked in and ran to my music room knowing they were following. And went strait to my piano. And played cold as you(Taylor swift )

**You have away of coming easily to me.**

**And when you, take you take the very best of me**

**So I start a fight **

'**cause I need to feel somethin'**

**And you do what you want 'cause im not what **

**You wanted.**

**(chorus)**

**Oh, what a shame.**

**What a rainy ending give to a perfect day.**

**Just walk away,**

**No use defending words that you**

**Never say.**

**And now that im sittin'**

**Here thinkin' it through, I've**

**Never been anywhere cold as you**

**(end of chores)**

**You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray.**

**And I stood there lovin' you and ****whished**** then all away**

**And you come away with a great little story of a mess**

**Of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you.**

**(chores over again im not going to type it 'cuz Im lazy)**

**You never did give a damn thing, honey.**

**But I cried, cried for you.**

**And I know you wouldn't have told anyone if I died **

**Died for you (died for you)**

**Oh, what a shame.**

**What a rainy ending give to a perfect day. **

**  
Ever smile you smile you fake is so condescending.**

**Counting all the scars you made.**

**Now that im sittin' here thinkin' it through, I've never **

**Been anywhere cold as you.**

After that I turned and saw all of them shocked. About 3 min. of that they recovered and Edward was the first to talk "Bella im sorry" "don't Bella im sorry me I've herd that I've herd you say im never going to leave you and you did and im never going to hurt you and you did what's next hm Edward you said you'd never kill me but you did!" I was practically screaming but he kept I calm and said " your wrong I never killed you" " oh yes you did you killed my heart ,my dreams ,my trust and my faith that Is something that will kill me every day Edward and there's not enough god damn sorrys in the world that can fix this".

"Bella calm down you make me want to punch Edward" jasper said " well to damn sad jasper I have the right to scream and be mad so if you cant take that then leave me the fuck alone" I think I just gave jasper whip lash " Bella I understand you mad" he said taking a step closer. "No jasper you don't, yes you know im mad but you don't know how much im in pain ok." "Bella stop being a bitch and let us talk to you" Rosalie said "I'm done ok done im not going to say anything I'm sorry Jasper for being a bitch but Edward im not sorry you can burn in hell for all I care" and with that I walked away mowing they weren't leaving yet.

_**Ok there you go and for your fyi all of this chap is in belly p.o.v. Ah toddles and remember to **__**LOVE EMMETT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**_


	8. what have you done!

_**Ok im sorry I haven't updated but I've been busty with school but the up side is that schools over next Friday for me but we pretty much have 31/2 days a school while actually 4 but I didn't go to school but enough of about me and more about Bella and Jasper.**_

_**Don't owe anything!**_

Belly p.o.v.

It's been a week sense my out break with the Cullen's and there still here all of them except Carlisle and Esme. I've haven't talk to any of them and have tried to stay away from them but that's kind of hard when the practically live here. But enough about that I've got to practice for my next concert.

My next concert was in 3 days so I had to get ready when I got there I saw a Volvo but thought nothing of it and walked in to the stadium. When I got in I sow Jacob talking to one of the back stage people. Then he walked over to me and said "you ready to start Bella" "yep" "ok let's start with 'here I stand' (Madina lake)" Jake said "k"

'**My hands shake 'cuz today,**

**I know you're gonna break my heart and,**

**My life with out you in it I**

**Is a life not worth living**

**I'll be strong but I wish I was someone else,**

**Anyone but me tonight**

**Here I stand (here I stand)**

**All alone, (here I stand)**

**Tonight (here I stand)**

**And I wish I was strong enough to breathe (here I stand)**

**Without you (here I stand)**

**I wish I was anyone but me.  
**

**So ill start to pretend im ok**

**But you should know by now that**

**My life is smoke and mirrors,**

**The one thing is crystal clear **

**That im the one wishing I was someone else,**

**Anyone but me tonight**

**Here I stand (here I stand)**

**All alone, (here I stand)**

**Tonight (here I stand)**

**And I wish I was strong enough to breathe (here I stand)**

**Without you (here I stand)**

**I wish I was anyone but me**

**(Where do we go?) (Where do we go?)**

**Inside I start to fall apart. (Where do we go?)**

**And Ill pretend im holding on (where do we go)**

**I GUESS ILL BLEED IN SILENCE (in silence)**

**I guess ill bleed in silence**

**Here I stand (here I stand)**

**All alone, (here I stand)**

**Tonight (here I stand)**

**And I wish I was strong enough to breathe (here I stand)**

**Without you (here I stand)**

**In my life, (here I stand)**

**I wish I was anyone but me.**

**Here I stand (here I stand)**

**All alone, (here I stand)**

**Tonight (here I stand)**

**And I wish I was strong enough to breathe (here I stand)**

**Without you (here I stand)**

**In my life, (here I stand)**

**I wish I was anyone but me.**

**Jasper p.o.v.**

Alice being Alice forced everyone to go to Bella's rehearsal. When I saw here singing and jumping around while singing I felt….. Something I've never felt before.

When she began to some what scream I felt her pain and it hurt more then my own.

But when she noticed we were all here she was mad. She turned and looked at Jacob but he just turned the other way and that made her madder. But Jacob just played her next song and she began to jump and bang her head again.

**What have you done now? **

**I know I'd better stop trying**

**You know that there's no denying **

**I won't show mercy on you**

**I know I should stop believing**

**I know I that there's no retrieving**

**It's over know**

**What have you done?**

**What have you done now?!**

**I, I have been waiting for someone like you **

**But now you are slipping away **

**What have you done now?**

**Why, why dose fate make us suffer **

**There's a curse between us **

**Between me and you**

**What have you done x4**

**What have you done now**

**What have you done x4**

**What have you done now?**

**Would you mind if I killed you **

**Would you mind if I tried to**

**Cause you have turned into my worst enemy**

**You carry hate that I don't feel **

**It's over now**

**What have you done? **

**What have you done now? **

**I, I have been waiting for some one like you**

**But now you are slipping away**

**What have done now?**

**Why, why dose fate make us suffer**

**There's a cures between us**

**Between you and me**

**What have you done x4**

**What have you done now?**

**What have you done x4 **

**What have you done now?**

**I will not fall**

**Won't let it go**

**We will be free**

**When it ends **

**I, I have been waiting for some one like you**

**But now you are slipping away**

**What have done now?**

**Why, why dose fate make us suffer**

**There's a cures between us**

**Between you and me**

**I, I have been waiting for some one like you**

**But now you are slipping away**

**What have done now?**

**Why, why dose fate make us suffer**

**There's a cures between us**

**Between you and me.**

Right after the song ended another began

**Dreams die hard **

**Lies hide in your eyes**

**It's your disguise **

**Mine is a broken dream**

**The fashion queen (Alice)**

**He's always mean (Edward)**

**A drama queen (Alice) **

**The manly dream (Edward)**

**Are happily ever after **

**But what about me **

**What about him do we ever get to win?**

**Is it a sin.**

**Where's my happily ever after seen**

**Im no drama queen **

**But he's a manly dream **

**So where's the happily ever after credits**

**Where's the end.  
**

**My friend I love you but you hurt me so there's no were left to go**

**I always hated the cold your heart I cold as stone**

**As you sit a pond throne do you ever have a second guess? **

**That my life has been so blest**

**Where the rest of my heart it was torn apart**

**From the start **

**Where's my happily ever after?**

It was a short song but I understood who she was talking about. She knows that Alice and Edward are happy but she wants me and her to be to.

After the song ended she walked over to Jacob and started to yell. "what the bloody hell Jacob whey are 'they' here?" she as pissed "Bella you have to work it out" he said in a calm way "NO, what if I don't what if I don't care happens" "though luck" "ass" then she walked away and started walking towards us.

_**Dundu dun what's going to happen no one knows not even me.**_

_**Tell next time AH TOODLES AND LOVE EMMETT.**_

_**Songs**_

_**Here I stand by madina lakes**_

_**What have you done by within temptation**_

_**And the last song is called happily ever after by me**_


	9. music of the heart

_**Here's the next chapter. And if you want more I want you to do something for me.**_

_**Tell your friends about this story tell your friends, friend's hell tell the people you hate but you know they like fanfics.**_

_**Don't own any thing**_

_**Belly p.o.v.**_

After yelling at Jacob I walked over to 'them'. Stop right of them and said "I want you to do something for me" "anything" the thing said (Alice) I ignored her (Bella's still mad at Alice) and said "I want you to watch and listen to my song' just one of those thing' (Meg and Dia) it explains how I feel and stuff like that ok" not waiting for them to answer I walk away .

Ally p.o.v.

After she walked away I felt bad for what Edward and I did but it just happened I felt bad then but it seemed to just disappear through out the years. All I said after she had gone was "let's go to a hotel and watch the video. 

20 minuets later we were at a hotel all sat in front of my computer. Looking for Bella song tell Emmett said "there it is with the video" pointing t o a place on my computer.

And I click on it and the screen turned black then Bella appeared. 

**She was sitting on a beach cross lagged just sitting nothing else. Then the music started. She had a photo book I front of here they were all pictures of us then she started to sing.**

**Give me a minute**

**I need a second**

**Got to breathe **

**There, it's just one of those things**

**Wish I could tell you **

**How much I need you **

**And how much you **

**Need me to go **

**She look up here eyes weren't gold and they weren't red ether they were lavender. Then a blue tear drop came down here cheek. Then the setting change she was standing next to a tree next to our forks home. She stared at it then began to walk towards the house. Then all of a sudden she was in Edward's room. **

**Please don't listen**

**To what I'm gonna tell you**

**Look in my eyes and know**

**That I simply had to give up**

**Then she was in the hall way that she ran in the last time she was there and then slowly walked down the stairs**

**But I didn't let go without**

**Struggle **

**You know, I still love you**

**Its just, just one of those things**

**Then she was in the piano room. Then she sat on the chair and played the piano.**

**I know I made it seem **

**Like all was written down**

**And I hid all my pain**

**And now I bring it out**

**Then she was I the baseball field. In the middle were our first run in with James was.**

**And you'll be scared at first**

**Cause it's such an ugly blow **

**I don't know which is worse **

**To learn or not to know**

**Please don't listen **

**To what im gonna tell you**

**Look in my eyes and know**

**That I simply had to give up**

**Then she was in Emmett's and rose's room sitting on there bed (eww how knows what they did in that bed)**

**But I didn't let go without**

**Struggle **

**You know, I still love you**

**Its just, just one of those things**

**She got up and started to look at pictures of them (Emmett and rose)**

**Please don't listen **

**To what im gonna tell you**

**Look in my eyes and know**

**That I simply had to give up**

**Then she's was in jasper's room and grabbed the guitar that he had left there then set it down and look at all the posters and pictures on the wall.**

**But I didn't let go without**

**Struggle **

**You know, I still love you**

**Its just, just one of those things**

**Then she was in la push walking in the middle of the street.**

**I tried to tell you a million**

**Times **

**That I have always **

**Been one of you **

**I tried to tell you a million**

**Times**

**You have always been one of us**

**Please don't listen **

**(I tried to tell you a million times**

**That I have always been one of you)**

**Please don't listen**

**(I tried to tell you a million times**

**That I have always been one of you)**

**Please don't listen…………**

**When she was at the end of the road it all went black.**

**Everyone was quiet. No one dared to speak. No one new what to say. We knew that when Bella's mad it's not pretty but she's not the one to give up.**

**We all loved Bella some more the others but still. Then I look at the screen and some thing popped out a song by Bella called ' nothing new' (by me)**

**I click on it and it began.**

**There's nothing new about me and you.**

**Just another****heart break**

**That I can take**

**As I breathe in and out **

**As trying not to shout**

**There's nothing I can do about me **

**about you **

**It's true **

**I could say never love but lust **

**I can not trust **

**Any one any more**

**That's what I store in my heart from the start.**

**Again nothing. Silence. Nothing.**

_**What will happen? Will the silence ever end. Its driving me insane. Just adding drama. Any who thanks for reading and remember review. AH TOODLES. AND LOVE EMMETT!!! **_


	10. cold dead heart reborn

**I know I haven't updated in like 2 months but I've been busy and now schools going to start im so sorry but here's then next chapter.**

**I hope to update again soon.**

**I don't own any thing.**

Bellyp.o.v.

Ya I gave up I shouldn't have it's a reflexes so I ran until I couldn't anymore I don't like pain no one dose but we have to live with it we don't want to but we do. So sense I bottled it up it came out in one massive blow. That hurt not only me but the Cullen's awhile I shouldn't care but I do and that what suck the most to know that it hurts them and to actually care. I mean why should it hurt me that I hurt them the only one that deserve it are Emmett and Rose and Jasper.

But it doesn't matter its true I still love them more then I should but what's weird is the person that I care about the most is jasper he got hurt to and when I saw him again I just wanted to huge him it took all my restraint not to, too just stand there and kick and scream which helps no one but I did it any ways and probably gave them whiplash but I don't want to be hurt again. Like the song says it's one of those thing that I want to tell that I need them I want them. But I can't have them I didn't want to give up but I had to it was a struggle but I had to I needed to.

I had to find myself but all I got in return was heart ace it was worse then when Edward left it felt like I was leaving something important behind and I didn't know what it was and I still don't but I think before things can get better I need to find out. I have to.

But I also know I want my family back I cant stand not having them again but I also don't want to be the one to come running back and crying and begging for them but I know deep in my dead rock hard heart that's what I need to do but I was never the one to do that now that I've been changed when I saw Edward and Alice I should have stayed and fix things and move one but I don't think I wanted to. I still don't but I have to…….

So its time to open Isabella Rosalie McCarty Whitlock cold dead heart once again but can I do that again and not be hurt?

**Sorry it was a small chapter but it had to be done just one step at a time so fallow me in the story and remember to love Emmett and PLZ REVIEW! AH TOODLS! THIS CHAPTER INSPIERD BY JUSTONE OF THOSE THINGS MEGAND DIA**


	11. blow out the candles, josey

Hey hey I know it's been forever but I need your help. Tell me what you want and what you don't.

Special thanks to: Cocoloco123 and gottaloveva, for commenting a lot!

Bella p.o.v.

After yesterdays (last chap) heart to heart with myself I haven't decided what to do about the Cullen's. So here I am pacing back and forth in my living room. When it all went black. I looked up at the light. The power went out.

I ran to my piano room grabbed a candle and began writing.

After 20min of writing the song was done. The concept of the song didn't really click until I started playing/singing it on the piano

**The power lines went out  
And I am all alone  
But I don't really care at all  
Not answering my phone  
All the games you played  
The promises you made  
Couldn't finish what you started  
Only darkness still remains**

Lost sight  
Couldn't see  
When it was you and me

Blow the candles out  
Looks like a solo tonight  
I'm beginning to see the light  
Blow the candles out  
Looks like a solo tonight  
But I think I'll be alright

Been black and blue before  
There's no need to explain  
I am not the jaded kind  
Playback's such a waste  
You're invisible  
Invisible to me  
My wish is coming true  
Erase the memory of your face

Lost sight  
Couldn't see  
When it was you and me

Blow the candles out  
Looks like a solo tonight  
I'm beginning to see the light  
Blow the candles out  
Looks like a solo tonight  
But I think I'll be alright

One day  
You will wake up  
With nothing but "you're sorrys"  
And someday  
You will get back  
Everything you gave me

Blow the candles out  
Looks like a solo tonight  
I'm beginning to see the light  
Blow the candles out  
Looks like a solo tonight  
But I think I'll be alright

Even with Edward I couldn't see clearly I couldn't see anything but him. I don't know if it was because he was my first boyfriend or because how usually beautiful he was. All I saw was black and white but when he left I didn't know what to see. Then there was Jacob my sun, who helped me see the brighter side of life. But

I don't know what happened when Edward came back it's like I just snapped back in to black and white.

Edward played to many games. Either he loves me or doesn't. He doesn't I understand but there is no reason to play me like a puppet. I'm not a frikin' Muppet.

But then he comes back saying he's sorry over and over but that is NOT enough for all the crap he put me threw. The endless night of nightmares and tears. But what I'm doing right know isn't helping my issue with the Cullen's …………… But it's helping me.

But something interrupted my think. My phone. I really didn't want to answer it. So I didn't.

I don't know where to go from here I've done the heart to heart and what I like to call musical therapy

But right know I want to do something stupid. I know I really shouldn't but really I don't care at the moment. So I went into my room changed into a black mini skirt and a purple tank and a black necklace and high heeled shoes. Grabbed my jacket and left my house heading for a club.

When I got there was a huge line but I walked right pasted it looking at the guard as he lifted up the satin red rope. When I got in side music was blaring from the speakers and the smell of perspiration and alcohol was in the air. Which brought the question can vampire's get drunk? Tonight was sure as hell the night I figured out. I walked strait to the bar and ordered 2 tequila's. When I took the first sip of the tequila that's when every thing went a blur. And I could have swoon I saw the Cullen's to my fare left but at that moment I really didn't care as I downed the rest of my tequila and my second one next thing I know my jacket was off and I was dancing when I turned around I saw a vampire that looked oddly familiar it wasn't a Cullen but a one of the rule enforcing vampires.(sorry I forgot there name and I didn't want to get up) Alec, Jane's brother. And at the moment he looked really sexy. And again it all went a blur and when it came back I was at my house and Alec was kissing, wait more like making out with me.

The weird thing is that I didn't pull away. I kind of enjoyed it. It didn't stop for like 10 min when we herd a growl.

I looked behind Alec's head and saw what looked like the Cullen's. Crap. Then the next thing I knew Alec was on the ground and Jasper was beating the crap out of him. Then I looked up and saw Emmett, Edward and Alice and Rose looking like they were about to kill. Then I looked back at Jasper and Alec and it wasn't pretty so out of instinct I yelled "STOP!!!!" in mid punch Jasper stopped and looked at me I don't know what my facial expression was but It made Jasper let go of Alec. Then all of a sudden I felt really weird and I think I pasted out.

_**Again short but hey i'm trying I don't know when my next chapter will be out but ill try to have it out soon.**_

_**This chapter was inspired by Josey and Candles by hey Monday.**_


	12. Im back !

_A/N_

_Smile-like-nothings-wrong_

_I'm sorry for how long I have been gone. Btw this for both my story's "change in hear" and "prom queen" _

_I will be resuming writing my story's I just hit a wall. I have started another story called Lessons to learn so if you like naruto story's read please. Well that's all fro now ttyl! : )_


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